Technology melt down

This is getting ridiculous - I shudder to think where we'll be in 2 years. No sleep? No food? You get the picture without TMI. I’m reading a book about Thomas Jefferson this month. If someone had a meeting with him, it would be 'sometime in the afternoon'. Grandfather's clocks were accurate to the nearest half hour, if you were lucky. If you wanted to communicate with someone in his time, you would send a letter and it would get there some day... Buzzzz 'Hold it please. One minute. My iPhone just vibrated.' I get a TM from Rick with a bunch of licence plate-ese jibberish (can someone tell me what the Sam Hill 'ttyl' means? STAT) and he wants a response NOW. Like not in 5 minutes even. Good thing I'm not in a compromised position... So, where was I? Back to how communication was so time passive, how things...*RING* (Picture pops up on the screen). 'Hello Sara, what's up? I'm trying to write a piece for the Oregonian and I need to concentr...They did what? I'll take care of it RIGHT AWAY.' I e-mail John chop chop and cc 5 others and bcc 3 others and tell them that we need to meet ASAP and imply that the sky will bloody fall in if we don't meet before lunch PDT. (jk... but it will get their attention) ...Where was I? Oh yes... So I wonder if people, before these iPhones and 'Crack'berries invaded our lives, had a bit more peace, a little more tranquility. Could smell a few more daisie...*Buzz/vibrate* 'Not a TM from her! Help me sweet Caroline'. I better jump on this tout de suite or else I'm toast. One minute please... and then my CNN news flash pops up - there's a flood in Baba Ghanoush and Jen is breaking up, and the Phillies are ahead in the 4th and my ex e-mails about baseball practice and where is the +)@?#/'! baseball bat marked 'URGENT' and Laurie phones me to see if I'm going to the meeting in 10 minutes. The phone battery is going low. I need to find an outlet PDQ or I'm up the creek! Where was I? ...So, I was wondering if, as they say, technology has made life simpler and more enjoyable...Ring. Ring..'I'M COMING already, for crying in a bucket! Yes, turkey and cheese is fine. Skip the pickle. Yes, that sounds fine, I could use the drink...'




by Stuart Emmons

The Oregonian Blog, May 20, 2008